Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Who are you willing to connect with? #Trust30, Day 23


Men imagine that they communicate their virtue or vice only by overt actions, and do not see that virtue or vice emit a breath every moment. - Ralph Waldo Emerson
Who is one person that you’ve been dying to connect with, but just haven’t had the courage to reach out to? First, reflect on why you want to get in touch with them. Then, reach out and set up a meeting.(Author: David Spinks)
Connect.  Intreresting concept really.  For all the multiple ways we have of disseminating information today, we are still not very good at connecting with others. 

When a person has 337 friends on Facebook, it does not really mean they have 337 friends. It means they know 337 people.  I know this to be true because I have 337 friends…on Facebook.  I can with a few strokes send out a message to all 337 of those friends and tell them where I am, what I am doing and even what I am thinking.  All 337 of them could potentially “like” what I say.  But have I really joined with them? Am I united with them?  Have I connected with them as a human being to a human being?

I have a blog where I publish my thoughts and even share the blog posts on Facebook.  I was paging through the blogs that come after mine and was interested to see the myriad of blog types and subject matter from cute family kid photos to black magic.  According to Digital Inspiration as of 2008 there were 156 million websites, including blogspot, Twitter, Typepad, Windows Live and Wordpress.  This is a composite number for all the earth.

That’s a lot of people talking.  But really who is listening?   The old adage of if a tree falls in a forest does it make a sound if no one is there to hear it, comes to mind.  Because really in looking through the blogs on blogspot it seemed relatively few had any followers at all.

We may have friends on Facebook, blog every day, are LinkedIn and Twitter to our heart’s desire but that does not mean we are connected or that we have connected with anyone.  We can stay in our bedroom all day with blinds drawn and do all of these things while being a hermit. By the way the definition of a hermit is a person who has withdrawn from society and is a recluse.

Connection comes when we bare our souls to another.  If we never reach out to another, we will never connect.  To have real, lasting relationships we must be willing to share who we really are.  We must listen to another and accept who they are.

As a life coach, one of the most difficult hurdles for me to overcome was to practice the acronym of WAIT:  Why Am I Talking?  A life coach must listen and ask questions to help another discover what is inside of them, where they want to go in life and what the next step small step toward that would be.  I may think I know what another should do but telling them is not productive. They have to discover it.  Only by discovering it, do they own it. 

I’ve always been able to talk to anyone.  It does not intimidate me to ask another a question even if it is a total stranger.  But connecting with another person is a different skill set entirely.  It requires work, commitment, diligence, understanding, honesty, respect, love. Sitting in your house typing on the computer may require an electronic connection but it is not the heart-to-heart soul connection that human beings require.  Perhaps it is a first step, unless of course, we use it as a substitute for the real thing. 

The question was who are you dying to connect with?  My answer is anyone and everyone God puts in my path each and every day.  Even digital friends can become people we really connect with if we are willing.  My question to whomever happens to read this is who are you willing to connect with?

1 comment:

  1. Great question! I want to connect and another way to say that is to see and be seen, to walk in the light, to walk in faith, to trust that God makes who I am acceptable and thus gives me strength to truly be myself in the midst of others. But the who is more difficult in light of time. I am willing to connect with those who cross the path of my purpose. Those who are negative, life sapping people would probably not fit that description. Those who want to go for it, what ever it is, would probably fit.

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